Deathwish 026: Fiona


“Still watching my shower drain like it holds horrors”

 

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I am going to die in the shower. I bought a dark brown shower curtain because they didn’t have black. A curtain that feeds my fear. Didn’t buy the clear one, the opaque one, or the white one. The comfort of seeing the bathroom, of awareness, is not something I was looking for.

Secretly, I love to be terrified.

The Psycho shower scene. The shower, the worst place to die. Naked, cornered, dripping wet. Unable to run without a slip/fall/break-your-neck/die. And I wouldn’t even see the knife-wielding maniac through this dark shower curtain.

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I never finished watching It. Turned the movie off when Pennywise came through the shower drain. That clown, terrifying because he would not go the fuck away. I’d watched it thinking it was safe, a fun kind of scary movie. Thought, there is no way a fucking clown is going to scare me.

It’s been years since I watched most of that movie. Five years? Seven? Ten? I can’t remember. Still watching my shower drain like it holds horrors. Avoid stepping on it, I could be sucked down into some sewer den of an evil clown, which I can only assume is where he lives.

It’s been so long since I’ve seen most of the movie, I remember little but my fear.

I hear a honk like a clown with no reasonable explanation. I scream, top of my lungs, and no one comes running to save me. I run, watery and soapy and slip on the bathroom tile. My fragile fucking skull misses the porcelain of the toilet by an inch or less. A white blur of a cracked-head death in my periphery before I land, palms down.

My whole body shakes, sweat through water.

I could have died running away. I am still more afraid of death by clown.

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To read the previous installment, "Deathwish 025: Natalie," go here. To participate in Deathwish, find details here.

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Fiona was born in Portland, OR and currently lives in Portland, OR.


Matty Byloos

Matty Byloos is Co-Publisher and a Contributing Editor for NAILED. He was born 7 days after his older twin brother, Kevin Byloos. He is the author of 2 books, including the novel in stories, ROPE ('14 SDP), and the collection of short stories, Don't Smell the Floss ('09 Write Bloody Books).

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