America, It Is Time to Take Responsibility
“half the nation condones sexual abuse, condones violation of women’s bodies”
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Until about 11pm Tuesday night, you could very accurately deduce that I was in denial. I believed so whole-heartedly since the beginning of this campaign that a man so sorely unqualified and inarticulate, a man so openly racist, a man whom I still question understands how the political system even works, would not be elected President of the United States. My belief was reinforced as we got closer to Election Day, most especially by Trump’s unwavering hatred, and his sexual abuse of women.
I woke up with a massive headache Wednesday morning. A headache from crying and choking back vomit all through the night. I don’t want to write this essay. It takes every grain of my being to try. As a survivor of sexual assault, my trauma has never been so triggered.
Have we ever elected a president after having knowledge of their multiple accounts of sexual assault? The indigestibility of the election results lies in my disbelief that so many people could pardon such violence against women. Even though Clinton won the popular vote, the fact remains that nearly half the nation condones sexual abuse, condones violation of women’s bodies, of girls’ bodies.
The tens of millions of people who voted for Trump either aligned themselves with all of his racism and misogyny or they chose to look the other way while selfishly hoping he would do something for their economic status. I am here to tell you that looking the other way is just as deplorable as doing the deed yourself. We all have a responsibility to hold our fellow Americans accountable in the face of hatred.
If you disregarded violating women’s bodies as an acceptable act to commit and brag about, then you have violated women’s bodies. If you ignored the plan to uproot and deport hardworking, courageous people who immigrated to this country to make a better life for themselves and their families, then you have facilitated the destruction of those families and their livelihood. Families so much like those that most of you descended from. If you say, “All lives matter,” then you are spitting in the faces of all the black people of our nation who are being slaughtered by police who are supposed to serve and protect them. You are spitting on your fellow citizens who deserve reparations from suffering 245 years of slavery and many more years still of inequality. If you pretend someone’s sexist joke isn’t a big deal, then you are degrading the women in your life, the women you pretend to love and support.
Where is your shame? Where is your conscience?
Trump will face a judge in court on December 6th for raping a 13-year-old girl in 1994. For repeatedly raping a 13-year-old at parties thrown by convicted pedophile Jeffrey Epstein, whom Trump proudly declares is his old friend. He has been able to keep this out of much of the media because the victim has received enough threats to not feel safe naming herself or holding a press conference. If this is a fact you can ignore for your own economic status, may you somehow be able to face the greed inside you with your eyes open. May you own your part in the violation of women’s bodies.
When we elect someone to any position of authority, especially a position as exalted as President, we are creating a model that directly and subliminally teaches us how to treat each other and how to behave.
America, it is time to take responsibility.
Those of us who are devastated could have done more. And now is the time to do more. It’s never too late for progress. Talk to each other about the ways you’ve fallen short in holding people accountable, especially white people. Imagine how you will do it better next time, and commit to doing it better.
I admit I did not recognize just how misogynistic our society is, even though it stares me in the face every day. I vow to keep my eyes open and my voice clear in speaking the truth while holding people I know accountable, holding myself accountable. I assume the responsibility of showing people how turning a blind eye is a contribution to affliction. I take responsibility to call out others when they contribute to xenophobia and homophobia.
America, it is time to assume what we are guilty of and to put that guilt to good use.
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Header image courtesy of Dr. Pavloff. To view his photo essay, go here.